Are Your Dreams Really Your Own?


 

Abstract:
 

A major value in our modern society is individualism. Almost everyone will proudly proclaim that they’re their own person, free and independent of other people’s opinions.
 

This narrative is so central to our culture that it’s hard for us to recognise and acknowledge to what extent we really are influenced by others. Your mission today is to find out what your dreams are like without anybody else’s influence.
 
 

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Task 1: Examine your dreams

 

To do this, you must first of all come to terms with the fact that yes, you are a product of the society you grew up in. Realise this isn’t a bad thing; humans need other humans to survive and thrive.
 

Acknowledge this and realise which part of your dreams and goals may be influenced by society. This is not to eliminate them! It’s simply important to have clarity about the origins of what you wish for.
 

Some examples of society’s norms and the goals based on them are:

  • Loving one’s family above everything else.
  • Finding your passion and making it your living.
  • Getting married and having kids.
  • Advancing in your job.
  • Material possessions such as a house, car etc.

your dreams

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Task 2: Navigate the unfamiliar

 

Again, wanting these things isn’t a bad thing, nor does it make you uncool. To a certain extent, it’s part of being human. We’re social beings and much as our upbringing contradicts it, we do depend on the group to survive.
 

Rather, once you realise you really do want something, it becomes unimportant whether anyone else wants it or not. You become sure of yourself. You feel calm, centered, purposeful.
 

Finding your true dreams can feel very unfamiliar at first, so be patient with yourself! Here are a few questions you might ask to identify them:

  • If money was no object and everyone I love was perfectly taken care of, what would I do every day?
  • Where would I live?
  • Who would I live with, if anyone?
  • What passion(s) would I pursue?
  • How would I contribute to society?

The answers give you clues on what truly meaningful goals might look like for you.

A Beautiful 2021 (Part 2/2)


 

Abstract:
 

In Part 1 two weeks ago, we reviewed and let go of the previous year. There was a lot to do, as it’s been such a weird and challenging year in many ways. Now it’s time to set ourselves up for 2021.
 

Especially if you struggled in 2020, it’s not enough to just say “good riddance” because unprocessed feelings have a habit of coming to haunt us. May sure you have closed off 2020 before you get ready for the next year.
 

Your mission today is to set yourself up for a beautiful 2021.
 
 

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Task 1: What success means to you

 

I said in the last episode that achievement isn’t just worldly or financial success. Getting through challenging times or battling issues is an achievment, too. We all have different challenges in life, which is why it’s imporant for you to define what success means to you.
 

Material success isn’t a bad thing, by the way. Receiving lots of abundance is beautiful! What I’m saying is, it isn’t the only kind of success we should acknowledge.
 

With a view to 2021, take a piece of paper and write down what success you wish to have. If it is “only” recovery health-wise or financially, or mentally, then that’s absolutely fine. Nobody gets to judge this.
 

beautiful 2021

Photo by Gift Habeshaw on unsplash.com


 

Task 2: A beautiful 2021

 

Now it’s time to get down to business. Write down everything you wish to do and achieve this year. Make it concrete: don’t write “more money” but instead a specific amount you wish to make.
 

Then write down the first steps you need to take. You don’t have to plan out the whole thing, just focus on the first steps. If you’re struggling with your mental health, write down your coping strategies and support system. Make sure to create enough room for it. If you strive for material success, write down what you need to do first to make it happen.
 

Lastly, plan and schedule when you’ll take the very first step towards your goals. Put it in your calendar and get started.

Closing Off 2020 (Part 1/2)


 

Abstract:
 

I can already hear you say: Good riddance! Let’s just get rid of 2020 and move on.” Others question whether I should do a review at all.
 

I believe that it’s even more important in a challenging year like this one, to come to terms with it and close it off. That way, you can set yourself up for a beautiful 2021.
 

As always, this process has two parts: The 2020 review today and setting yourself up for 2021 in two weeks’ time (early January). Your mission today is to close off 2020 for yourself.
 
 

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Task 1: Define achievement

 

On social media, I’ve seen people question the need for a review of 2020 altogether. “Don’t ask me for my achievements – even getting through this year is an achievement!” they say.
 

My reply: Exactly.
 

We need to stop looking only at material “success” in terms of money or jobs. Struggling with physical or mental health is an achievement. Getting to the end of a challenging year like 2020 is an achievement. Please keep this in mind when you do Task 2.
 

closing off 2020

Photo by Gerd Altmann on pixabay.com


 

Task 2: Closing off 2020 – the year review

 

It’s time for the actual review. Please set aside some time, get comfortable and get something to write. The process is:
 

1. Write down what went well
There were definitely a few good things this year as well! Write it all down. Also remember Task 1 and include the fact that you have got this far.
 

2. Write down what didn’t go well
Get it all on paper and be sure to feel the feelings associated with these things. Feel the pain, the anger, the mourning, the frustration.
 

3. Let it go
Once you’re done with the “feeling” part, take the 2nd piece of paper and either burn it (be safe though!) or tear it up and throw it into a flowing water like a river. Feel it all being washed away or going up in smoke.

One Thing You Need To Actually Manifest What You Want


 

Abstract:
 

Ever since the movie The Secret, the process of manifestation and the law of attraction have been widely known. And yet, it’s still one of the most misunderstood concepts as well. Even those who do their best to understand, often don’t manage to attract the things they want.
 

Your mission is to learn the one thing you must master in order to manifest what you truly want.
 
 

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Task 1: Learn the process of manifestation

 

Those who believe the law of attraction is a humbug, are fond of saying that it’s supposed to attract “whatever you think”. Indeed it’s what sources like the movie say at the beginning – the point is, they don’t leave it at that.
 

In its simplest form, the process is:

  • thoughts, which lead to
  • feelings, which spark
  • inspired action, which leads to
  • results.

 

This process is deceptively simple, because the above steps are logical and natural. If you’ve ever achieved anything, chances are you’ve followed them without consciously noticing. But there’s a rub, an element which is easily overlooked.
 

manifest what you want
 

Task 2: Manifest what you want

 

The one missing piece of information is that “feeling” doesn’t mean to temporarily put yourself into a state where you’re excited about the thing you’re manifesting. The deciding factor is to expect the result.
 

In life, you don’t get what you think, or feel, and often not what you work for either. You get what you expect.
 

Unfortunately, that’s where the real work comes in. How can you stop doubting? What if you carry trauma? The answer is, you’re going to have to change in order to manifest a changed reality. Here are a few suggestions to get you started.
 

  • Work on healing your trauma.
  • Do things that make you happy (such as pursuing your passion!).
  • Seriously, do what makes you happy.
  • Visualise your goal. Daydream about it in the present tense.
  • Express what you want in a creative way (paint it, write it, dance it).

Do You Live Your Life Or Is It Happening To You?


 

Abstract:
 

Humans are notoriously bad at creating happiness. Most think happiness comes from success or from security and material possessions. However, studies show that that’s not the case.
 

In fact, it seems that the happiest people are those who feel in control of their lives and the unhappiest feel they need to cope with what happens to them. Your mission is to find out to what extent you have control and how to increase the control you have.
 
 

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Task 1: To what extent do you live your life?

 

Gurus love talking about “creating” your life so much, the phrase has become meaningless. I suggest to think of it as living actively, rather than reacting passively. Here are some indicators of how actively you participate in your life experience.
 

  • When was the last time you made a decision that scared you?
  • When was the last time you said “No” to someone?
  • How often in the last five years have you set a goal that took longer than a year to accomplish, and then actually achieved it?
  • When was the last time you did something fun/beneficial/meaningful you had never done before?

 

live your life

Photo by Caique Silva on unsplash.com


 

Task 2: Shift to control

 

You often hear me quoting Stephen Covey, who pointed out that we should focus on what we have control over: our own lives, our own reactions, our decisions. He, too, said that people who do this tend to be happier than those who focus on things outside their control.
 

How can you take back more control? Here are a few things you can do today to live your life actively.
 

  • Set beautiful, wild, exciting, over-the-top goals. Start working on them today.
  • Get a Coach. Seriously.
  • Connect to your emotions; check in several times a day and take them seriously.
  • Choose three things or people currently in your life to say “no” to.
  • Do or plan doing something new today.