• Do You Have The Discipline To Get What You Want?



    “I’m just not disciplined at all,” said my client, explaining how she often starts something and then doesn’t see it through. It’s a familiar story to many; I’m the first person to own up to being flaky.

    Are we then doomed to lives of mediocrity? Will our passions only ever be a hobby?

    In fact, nobody is born with discipline – or without it. It’s an action, or rather a number of repeated actions, and can be trained just like a muscle.

    Your mission today is to learn how discipline is easily achievable for you.

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    Task 1: What’s your discipline habit?


    Because discipline isn’t a character trait, but rather an action, the question whether you have it or not is a question of – you keep hearing me mention this – habits, which are based on your beliefs.

    I identified three types in a previous episode on self-discipline. I then suggested self-indulgence as a way to break through resistance. Your task is to find which category you fall into and identify your personal habit.

    Once you’ve done that, you’re ready to develop real, healthy discipline.

    Photo by Moos-Media on Pixabay.com


    Task 2: Your next step


    This task depends on your result from Task 1:

    Iron discipline: Well done but don’t ignore your own needs. Be good to yourself and regularly check if the goal you strive for with so much discipline is still aligned with what you want.

    Given up: Set yourself baby steps. Start with tiny commitments, and then work your way up. You’ll soon see that you’re capable of much more discipline than you thought possible.

    Try and fail: Your beliefs are really good at justifying rationally why you can’t stay disciplined today. To combat this, you need to cut through the cr*ap with a simple Nike-style “Just do it”. Make a decision that you won’t indulge in any inner debates and do it regardless. It sounds simple, but it works!

    Remember: Discipline consists of action, not thoughts or words.

  • Keep Pushing Or Do What Feels Right?



    I sometimes come across conflicting advice when I research the latest in Coaching, Psychology etc. Some experts tell you to go with your gut and do what feels right, others say you need to stick with your goal and push through no matter what.

    So what’s correct?

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    Is your goal still right for you?


    There’s an easy process to find out whether you’re only going through a rough spot, or whether your goal is no longer right for you. What you do is visualise your goal – not the current trouble, but the overall goal – and then see how it feels inside.

    Do you feel expansive or excited at the thought of your goal, or tight, tense, contracted? Your gut reaction tells you all you need to know.

    self care

    Steps to take


    1. Practise Self Care
    Find out what you really need, and fulfill that need. Be gentle with yourself, take time to rest, meditate, do whatever you need to get back on an even keel. Listening to yourself and taking things slowly can get you further than powering through.

    2. Change your approach
    When you work on something with dedication, it can sometimes give you tunnel vision. If you feel resistance, a change in your approach could work wonders. It’s often an outside view that can give you the best idea, so ask your Coach or a good friend or teacher; they often see the obvious step we never thought of.

    3. Develop discipline
    There definitely is a case for discipline, too. Sometimes you just have to push through in order to see results! However, it doesn’t always have to be an 8-hour day for your goal or passion. Set yourself one hour, or 1 1/2, and really stick with those, no matter if it’s what feels right at the time.