But I Can’t Afford The Life Of My Dreams!


 

Abstract:
 

90% of the people I talk to, react in a similar way: When I ask them what their dreams are, they will name something that isn’t all that far beyond their current life. If I press them to go completely overboard, they’ll respond with: “But I could never afford to live like that.”
 

What they don’t understand is that the point of goals is not to know how you’ll achieve them. In fact, Bob Proctor said: “If you know what to do to reach your goal, it’s not a big enough goal.”
 

Your mission is to do what Neo needed to do in the Matrix: “Free your mind”.
 
 

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Task 1: Reason is overrated

 

There is a place for reason. A goal isn’t worthless just because you know how to reach it, and yet, I agree that at least some of your goals or dreams should be far outside of what you think possible.
 

Examine what keeps you from dreaming big. Do you feel a little silly? But imagination is limitless, and so is creativity. Do you think it’s impossible? Fact is, lots of people have achieved things far beyond what they thought they could. The evidence is plenty.
 

Thinking creatively, going beyond, even into the realm of silliness, is a skill you can learn. Set yourself a reminder once a week for “dream time”.
 

my dreams

Photo by silviarita on pixabay.com


 

Task 2: Program your mind for your dreams

 

This is an ongoing task and will take some time. Basically, you need to brainwash yourself. Here are a few steps for you to take:
 

  1. Read something positive every day. Include books on finances (try Amanda Steinberg or Jen Sincero). Make time for it.
  2. Follow blogs, podcasts, YouTube channels by personal development experts. You could start with my newsletter and videos!
  3. Surround yourself by positive people. Know anyone who’s into this stuff? Seek them out and spend more time with them.

What Your Life Could Look Like

dream life

I’ve always had big dreams. When I was a teenager in Germany, I dreamed of visiting Ireland. As a university student, I spent two years in Ireland and later moved here altogether. From childhood on, I knew I wanted to see other countries, and during my 20s and 30s, I lived and worked in four different countries.
 

When I discovered Coaching and experienced the fastest and most profound personal growth in my life with the help of my first-ever Coach, I knew I’d found my calling. Years later, I became a Coach myself, eventually studying for and gaining a recognised qualification in Personal and Executive Coaching. Then I dreamed of having more time and space for Coaching and my other passions and made that happen in 2015.
 

Now my dreams include growing my business and living a more sustainable life surrounded by people I love. I’m working on it, and I’d say that judging by my track record, I’ll achieve this one, too. It’s a wonderful feeling dreaming up one’s perfect life and then going for it. Nothing quite compares to it!
 

What does this mean for you? I’m going to attempt to paint you a picture and help you give shape to your own dreams, so you’ll be able to look at your life a few years from now and say: “That was when I first dreamt about xyz, and now I’ve achieved it.”
 
 

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There’s nothing wrong with you

 

Before I continue, I’d like to make one thing absolutely clear: I believe in dreams and always having a goal, but I don’t think people are broken or that their lives aren’t perfect the way they are. Too many self-styled “Coaches” try and tell you that your life’s all wrong and needs fixing (usually, followed by an offer to fix it for you – for a substantial amount of cash, of course).
 

I don’t believe in making people feel bad about themselves. Moreover, it’s my belief that everything happens in perfect timing and that we’re always exactly where we need to be in order to learn what we need to learn.
 

What’s even more important is the insight that this is simply the way life works. Everything that lives, grows (a tree that’s stopped growing, simply dies). Sometimes, we’ll find ourselves in situations, jobs, or relationships we don’t like. At other times, we’re on top of the world.
 

Wherever we stand at the time, it’s always a good thing have a dream in order to continue growing. It doesn’t necessarily mean we don’t like where we are. On the contrary, a dream is more powerful if it isn’t created out of desparation but out of a feeling of happiness and gratitude for the present.
 
 

A passion-centered life

 

Whatever your dreams for the future are, they probably include a very happy you. In my experience, human beings are happiest when they live aligned with their purpose, and that purpose is ususally connected to their passion (or multiple passions). In order to create a dream of a happy future, I therefore suggest you paint a picture of you focusing your life on what lights you up.
 

What would your days look like if they revolved around your passion? What would you do? Imagine money wasn’t an object, because believe me, it never is once someone truly puts their passion front and centre. Somehow, a solution always presents itself, even if you can’t see it just now. That’s why I suggest to not concern yourself with this particular detail.
 

Instead, pretend you didn’t have to worry about money or a place to stay at all. See a perfect day in your life, fulfilling your purpose and doing what lights you up. How would you feel first thing in the morning, when you wake up and realise you have only fun things to look forward to? What would you say to your loved ones during the day? What would you think about falling asleep at night?
 

Paint this picture in as much detail as possible. When I say “paint”, I don’t just mean you should imagine it like an actual picture, but to use all your senses. Hear the sounds, smell the scents, feel what you’re touching or holding. Bring the scene to life as much as you can.
 

Finally, it’s time to distill the main cornerstones of your dream and put them down in writing. Out of these, you can craft your next goals and go for them. Keep doing this, because life is too short to spend it without striving for something beautiful which excites you. You’re just like that tree: for as long as you live, you’ll grow and evolve, and you might as well do this consciously, after your own planning, rather than leaving it to chance.