Your Future Self Calls And Says…


 

Abstract:
 

“Hi!”
 

Ok, seriously. There have definitely been times in my own life when I felt like I wasn’t moving forward. I tried to go self-employed and went back to employement only months later because it just wasn’t feasible. One year, I applied for a mortgage and was turned down.
 

I have a mortgage now. I’m also moving towards transitioning out of my daytime job, and this time I’ll actually be able to live on what I’m making. If I could reach back in time and talk to myself five or ten years ago, I’d tell her to hold out, to pursue passions, to focus on joy, and to trust the process.
 

What would your future self say to you if they could see you right now?
 
 

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Task 1: Where are you now?

 

Determine where you stand in each area of life (the Life Audit is a great way of doing that!): personal, financial, health-wise, regarding your passions… Be honest.
 

Don’t use this exercise to pass judgment on yourself. Instead, assume the viewpoint of an outside observer, evaluating your life as objectively as possible.
 
 

Task 2: Where do you want to be?

 

We’re talking pipe dreams here. In an absolutely ideal dream-life, where would you be in each of the categories?
 

Be very specific. “Rich” or “a millionaire” doesn’t cut it. “Living off interest to the tune of 5,000 a month” is more like it.
 

Your Future Self Calls

Photo by Johannes Plenio on unsplash.com


 

Task 3: Ask your future self

 

Now imagine you got visited by your own self from ten years in the future. She knows your results from Tasks 1 and 2, because she is you. What would she tell you (if you have trouble imagining this, then first try and imagine what you’d tell your past self)?
 

It can help looking into a mirror for this, and actually talking to your mirror image. Make a note of your wisdom, and think of ways to use this knowledge today.

Monday Sparkles: Information Overload vs Action

Information overload, coaching, pursue your passion
A few years back, I went to see Peter Gabriel live (again), and in between two songs he talked about, in his typical insightful way, how these days dictators can no longer get away with “disappearing” people in secret. People will spread the news via the internet to every corner of the earth. He went on to say that ordinary people have never been so powerful, and that we have yet to realise the full extent of that power we hold through modern media.

I’m tickled by the potential, the endless possibilities of this. In a way, I already participate in this with my one-woman freelance business which is conducted through Skype, with people from all over the world, people I never would have connected with if it wasn’t for the internet. Peter Gabriel is right, we have only just scratched the surface of what we can do.

There is, however, a danger inherent in the immediate accessibility of information. That danger is that we will get better and better informed all the time, learn more and more, but fail to actually do anything. And with the constant bombardment from advertising and cute but pointless Social Media stories, we often end up spending a disproportionate amount of time on trivial bits of “news” instead of taking action and living our own lives.
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Information Overload

Have you ever scrolled through Facebook, commented, reacted, clicked and read articles, and suddenly realised you just spent two full hours doing nothing but stare at your computer (or phone)? It’s scary how these things can eat up your time, even if the articles you’ve been reading were actually useful.

Marie Forleo says: “Clarity comes through engagement, not thought.” We try to figure out our lives and move forward, and to that end we tend to collect and consume more information and learning, hoping that this will give us direction and purpose. In reality, though, only action – moving forward, making mistakes, performing course corrections and gaining ever more experience – will give us the clarity we crave.

 

Striking the balance

Some people reject the internet and especially Social Media altogether, but that’s throwing out the baby with the bathwater. I don’t think we should forego all the amazing benefits of the internet just because we can’t restrain ourselves and “overdose” on information. In the following, I give you some steps to take towards sanity and a productive balance between information and action.

Be smart with your online time. I used to have my email open in one tab and Facebook in another at all times when I was at the computer. Every time I saw a new notification or email, I’d interrupt what I was working on and check it out compulsively. It scattered my focus and made my work take twice as long.

These days, I check email and my social media accounts three times a day. When I receive newsletters (yes, I too am subscribed to some newsletters, just like you read Monday Sparkles!), I save them in a special folder and read them in the half-hour I have allocated each day for “educational reading”. I quickly scan through offers and promotions, reply to business and personal emails, look through my social media accounts, respond to comments etc, and then I close these tabs again. Done.

To cut it short: I recommend using the internet, but use it on your own terms and in your own time.

Spend “offline” time with people who matter. I have recently ramped up my work on my Coaching business, and whilst this is one of my passions and lights me up, it also means more time spent on my own, working, because I also have a daytime job. To balance this, I make a conscious effort to have fun in between, and most especially to meet friends “in the flesh” regularly. I often don’t feel like I’m missing something and only afterwards realise how good it’s done me to actually hug and talk to people I love.

To cut it short: Your passions are important, but so are the people in your life. Make sure to spend quality time with loved ones regularly.

Take action. Forget waiting for the right time, or until you’re ready. If you want to do something, start! Get Coaching (the shortcut to action!), get a teacher, do whatever it takes to get into action mode. If you just keep reading and learning about it, you might get smarter but you’re no step closer to actually living what you really want.

To cut it short: Stop overthinking and take a first step towards your goal today. You can thank me later!

Smart Routines For Wild Success

 

 

Some reactions are fairly predictable. When I tell people I’m a Coach, they usually assume I teach people what to do (which I don’t, as explained in this article). When I talk about routines, people roll their eyes and think of a boring, restrictive practice designed to keep them from being spontaneous and having fun.

Nothing could be further from the truth. I’d actually say that the opposite is the case: Routines, used in the right way, will free you up to be spontaneous and make time for that which brings you joy in your life.

Routines are a Wild Spirits best friend. To make them work for you and avoid pitfalls along the way, I’ll give you a detailed roadmap below.

 

The science

A lot of people assume that their minds take in all the information and all the sensual impressions around them all day. In fact, it would be absolutely overwhelming for us to try and process the billions of details and information our brains are bombarded with all day. Therefore, most of them end up as quick impressions stored only in our subconscious. We aren’t even aware of them.

What we consciously notice is what the brain has deemed important information. We have a degree of control over this, for example someone who cultivates a positive focus will consciously notice things which re-inforce this focus.

The lesson behind this is that our minds have a limited capacity. That’s why, when you are preoccupied with relationship trouble or a pleasant memory of the weekend, you find it so hard to concentrate on the work in front of you!

 

Routines to the rescue

Habits and routines help us free up “mind space” because they become, well, habitual and therefore take up much less attention. Think of actions you perform every day, such as taking a shower or brushing your teeth. Your mind is completely free to wander, because you hardly have to concentrate on what you’re doing.

The idea behind implementing smart routines is that they will become almost automatic and use very little of your mind’s power, thereby leaving you with plenty of energy and focus to do what’s actually important to you.

Here are examples of useful routines. Simply pick what sings to you and spend the next weeks implementing the new habit. Remember, you need to stick with it for at least three weeks for a new routine to become automatic!

Morning routine – If you start off your morning in the right way, it’ll set the tone for the rest of the day. Consider things like 15 minutes of reading a positive book, five or ten minutes of meditation, yoga, or simply sitting with your tea or coffee for a few minutes and relax before leaping into the chores of the day. It’s well worth getting up a little earlier for this.

Workout routine – Research has shown that we are more likely to stick with a workout if we do it around the same time every day (or twice a week, or whatever suits). I have a friend who goes for a run as soon as he comes home from work, every day without fail. If a practice becomes this automated, it’s hardly a question of motivation anymore. He told me he’d feel weird if he didn’t go!

Self Care routine – A Self Care routine could be 15 minute bath in the evening or daily journaling, a walk in nature, or something really simple: I’ve found that I need a little space for myself when I finish up work, around 15 minutes just to wind down. I honour this need even now that I work from home, and it’s doing me very good.

Evening routine – Saying your prayers before bed, or reading a book for half an hour, are little habits that are easy to acquire and maintain. A bedtime routine also helps you to fall asleep more easily, as any parent with a toddler can confirm! It’s not just for children, though – if you try it out, you might be surprised at the beneficial effects.

I hope this list inspired you to think about routines you might already have, and new ones you’d like to implement. You can always tweak an existing routine if you find something else works better for you; our situations change, and so do our needs. Once you have working routines in place, you’ll discover how wonderful it feels to have the everyday things taken care of. And then you’re free to focus on your joy and passion(s)!

 

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